


Fortis Fortuna Adiuvat

by Infinitefleurs



Series: Dum Amo, Vivo [4]
Category: Fallout (Video Games), Fallout: New Vegas
Genre: Established Relationship, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Nightmares, Post all DLC tbh but Dead Money is referenced most, Post-Dead Money, Separation Anxiety, also Seb is a crybaby leave him be, there's a lot of hand holding, they're boyfriends and they love each other this is my city now, this takes place during For Auld Lang Syne
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-07
Updated: 2018-06-07
Packaged: 2019-05-19 07:45:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,719
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14869610
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Infinitefleurs/pseuds/Infinitefleurs
Summary: Once Sebastian and Arcade had gathered the Remnants for a final battle at Hoover Dam, Arcade realizes that it isn't his fight and decides that he'll be staying at the Old Mormon Fort. The Courier doesn't exactly take too lightly to it.





	Fortis Fortuna Adiuvat

**Author's Note:**

> I played Arcade's personal quest again for the first time in a long time and got very emotional, so. Here we are! This is my first New Vegas fic and I'm not sure if I got Arcade's character right but I hope you all still like it!

Sebastian had been quiet for a grand total of thirty minutes when Arcade figured out something was wrong.

One thing the Followers doctor learned in his time with Courier Six was that he was a _massive_ chatterbox. No matter the situation, no matter where they were, the man always had something to say about it. Now they were on their way to gather the Remnants for one last battle and he didn’t even seem the _least_ bit excited about it. There was something definitely off about that. Arcade wasn’t a man of many words, but he found the silence rather bothersome, and so he breaks it with a little cough.

“So… we’re on our way to gather the remains of a paramilitary organization for one last hoorah at Hoover Dam. Pretty— pretty cool right?”

Sebastian blinks, and for a moment there’s a faint smile on his face. “Well, when you put it like that… yes, I think it’s pretty awesome.” There’s a weak laugh on his end, and of course, it isn’t enough for Arcade.

“Wait, wait a second,” the taller man starts, stopping in his tracks. “What’s the problem?”

Sebastian only gives him a puzzled look. “...Nothing? C’mon, we still have a long way to Novac.”

“No, something’s bothering you. You’re quiet and that’s very much unlike you. What’s wrong?”

Sebastian gives him a little smile and shakes his head. “...It’s nothing. Thinking of things. Y’know, trapped in a deadly casino, got my spine and heart taken, walked through the Divide... things like that. It’s… a lot.” It wasn’t exactly _why_ he was quiet at the moment, but it did have some part in it. He almost looks startled when Arcade reaches for his hand, but he smiles again. This time, it’s more genuine. “Hey. I’ll be _fine_.”

“Right. That happened. I still think the Sierra Madre was the worst one.” Arcade laughs dryly, but he remembers how scared _and_ pissed he was at the Courier for just running off like that without telling him. He was relieved when Sebastian finally returned, but he was practically mangled; so close to death… He was bruised and bloodied, had broken bones in multiple places, and was left with scars that ran deeper than just physical. It had taken the other man weeks to not flinch at the sight of a radio, and the doctor supposes that was the hardest part of it all. Arcade squeezes his hand—it’s a way to push away the thoughts, he supposes—and gives him a knowing look. “Sure you’ll be fine. But I swear you are a magnet for trouble. Try to avoid running off without telling me, okay? I can deal without a few heart attacks.”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” Sebastian’s tone is joking, but apologetic. “I’ll be sure to bring you along on my next great adventure.” He was referring to the second battle at Hoover Dam this time, but that’s what he was worried about in the first place. Arcade had been so adamant on bringing what was left of the Enclave together, talking about his place in all this… he wasn’t sure if Arcade was even gonna stick around long enough— _with_ him, for that matter—to see it. He figures that was what the doctor was trying to get at earlier, so he quickly shrugs it off.

Sebastian wasn’t as quiet as he was earlier, and that reassures Arcade for the moment. “Of course. Someone has to keep you patched up, after all. You can’t just… keep jamming Stimpaks wherever you please.” He realizes he’s still holding onto the younger man’s hand, but he doesn’t let go, instead giving him a firm but gentle squeeze.

“I know, you’ve told me that before.” The Courier laughs, and for a moment forgets why he was even upset in the first place. Sebastian looks off in the distance, taking note of the quickly diminishing sunlight. “...It’ll be dark soon. We should find some place to camp out.”

Arcade knew a deflection when he saw one, but he nevertheless humors it with a chuckle. “What, too tired to deal with the potential threat of raiders and other wasteland scum? Seems very much unlike you, Sebastian.” It had been a long while before Arcade had learned of the Courier’s real name, and he’d only learned it when he grew tired of referring to him as just Six. He was more than just any old mailman, and fortunately enough the other had been very forthcoming with his name.

Sebastian almost looks giddy; the others knew his name as well, but there was something much more… _special_ about it when Arcade said it, as silly as it seemed. He swings their hands as he starts walking again, their fingers gently linked together. “Thought you’d be happy to hear that,” he starts, a small chuckle rising from his throat. “But yeah, long day. We’ll go raider hunting tomorrow. I’m starting to get hungry, anyways.”

Arcade hums, and eventually motions towards an abandoned gas station. “Well, we can set up over there. Set up a fire and I’ll… try to make something. Quickest way to a man’s heart is through his stomach and all that.” He gives another dry laugh at his attempt at humor, but when he looks over at the other, he blinks at the light tinge of red on his cheeks.

“Sometimes you’re really cute without trying. You already _have_ my heart.”

“That’s… wow. That’s really cheesy. I expect no less from you.”

“You know me, I’m good with words.” Sebastian gives the taller man a grin, and he only gets a roll of Arcade’s eyes in return.

“Is that so? Well, I don’t have a silver tongue myself but I can think of a few occasions where you’ve more than stumbled over your words.” Arcade chuckles at the thought. Sebastian hadn’t been exactly… subtle when it came to feelings. He had half-stumbled into the Old Mormon Fort after a few drinks at the Atomic Wrangler and he might as well have announced it to everyone there. The red had been extremely prominent on the doctor’s normally pale cheeks, but the whole thing was still very much endearing. He almost wishes the Courier hadn’t taken his comment about having a man swooping him off his feet to heart, though.

“I see where you’re getting at. Fine, but it still worked, y’know? You should’ve seen your face when I picked you up.” Sebastian laughs, rummaging through his things before rolling out the bedroll he found back at the Divide. It’s not long before he gets a fire started and Arcade wastes no time in getting their dinner ready.

In the span of five minutes, Sebastian had gone quiet yet again, and it leaves Arcade scanning his face every couple of minutes in an attempt to figure out what was bothering him. Sure, there was the Sierra Madre and the other fantastic journeys he made _without_ him, but… it wasn’t hard to tell that there was still some underlying issue bothering him, and Arcade could only wonder why the other wasn’t being open with it.

“You’re staring,” Sebastian starts, a gentle smile on his face as he pokes the fire. “I don’t look _that_ good, do I?”

“I suppose you do.” Arcade shrugs, quirking a brow at him. “Or maybe, you just have something on your face and I find it too funny to tell you.”

At that, Sebastian brings a hand up to see if there was anything on his face, and when there was none, he pouts. Looking at Arcade again, he frowns. “You’re still worried about earlier, aren’t you?” When Arcade gives a nod of affirmation, he sighs softly. “I… I can’t tell you yet, okay? But I promise I will.”

“You aren’t usually the secretive type, but fine.” Soon enough, Arcade finishes up with cooking and he walks around the fire, settling beside the Courier.

Sebastian is busying himself in his food, but he takes the time to say something once his mouth wasn’t full. “Aren’t you eating?” He asks, gently leaning against the other’s shoulder. When Arcade waves him off, Sebastian rolls his eyes. “You always say that. Hold on, I’m getting you something.” He sets his food down to rummage through his things again. A moment later, he hands the taller man an apple. “Have this for now.”

Arcade only quirks an eyebrow at him again. Nevertheless he smiles, taking a bite. “Fine, if you insist.”

 

* * *

 

After dinner, Arcade found Sebastian right in his usual spot: lying down on his lap. The Courier had been in a much more talkative mood now that he had some food in him. He’s been talking about the nicer side of his journeys, something he hasn’t exactly had the chance to do since his return from the Divide. He talks about how clear the night sky was in Zion Valley, and how the constant rain was invigorating, and he talks about the scientific discoveries he’s made in Big Mountain. And as much as Arcade was cautious around old Enclave technology, he can’t help but feel some sort of gratitude for the ED-E model Sebastian had found in the Lonesome Road.

His hands absent-mindedly thread through the Courier’s hair, occasionally twirling a few strands around his fingers. “Seems like you had a good time, despite nearly getting yourself killed on multiple occasions.”

“What can I say? I know how to have a good time.” Sebastian smiles, the feeling of Arcade’s hands in his hair soothing him. It wasn’t often he could just relax and enjoy the cool air of the Mojave, and so he dearly enjoyed the moments when he could. “...Hey, Arcade.”

“Yes, Sebastian?”

The Courier grins, reaching up to gently caress the doctor’s cheek with calloused fingertips. You know how much I love you, right?”

“I—” Arcade splutters, gently smacking the other in the face. “Yeah, I’m aware of that, as sappy as you’re being right now. But I love you too. Now go to bed, we _do_ still have a walk ahead of us.”

Sebastian soon sits up, pressing a brisk kiss to Arcade’s temple. Arcade reciprocates with a kiss to his forehead. “You’re going to bed too, right? He doesn’t even wait for the other’s response before tugging him over to the bedroll. “No, wait. Yes you are. No buts.”

“No buts.” Arcade echoes before settling down in his spot. He watches the other put out their little fire before settling on the spot next to him. Once he’s taken off his glasses and set them somewhere safe, he shuts his eyes

 

* * *

 

Sebastian awakes with a start.

His heart is pounding, and it’s hard to breathe. His first thoughts were he was back in the Cloud, and that night with Arcade was merely a dream; a trick of his mind. His hands reach up in a vain attempt to tear off the bomb collar that was long gone; the scratching makes his skin sting but he doesn’t care. The tears are flowing freely down his cheeks, and just as he’s about to draw blood, he feels a pair of hands on his, tearing them away from his neck.

“ _Sebastian!_ ” Arcade’s grip on him is tight, and for a moment his voice seems to bring him back. “Stop, _stop_ , I’m here.” When Sebastian’s hands stop struggling, he lets go, but only to wipe away his tears. “Breathe.”

“I— I can’t, the Cloud,” Sebastian starts with a shake of his head. It takes a few moments, but he soon finds his words. “M-Makes it hard to breathe, the Sierra Madre—”

“—is behind you.” Arcade cuts him off, and he doesn’t move when the other buries his head in his shoulder. “You’re not at the Sierra Madre. You’re back in the Mojave, _with_ me.” It takes a few, agonizing moments, but the Courier eventually calms down, although his breath was still shaky. “You’re home, alright?”

“...I’m home.” Sebastian echoes, taking a few, deep breaths. “Okay, I-I think I’m fine now, I’m sorry. That’s… the first time in a long while since I’ve dreamt about the Sierra Madre.” He gives a dry laugh, still holding Arcade close. Arcade’s hands were in his hair again and he wouldn’t have it any other way. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”

“Stop apologizing.” Arcade’s voice is firm, but he soon lets out a sigh. It was hard seeing the other like this, but he does his best to help. It was still the wee hours of the morning, still dark but the sun would be coming up anytime soon. “It’s alright, I can only imagine how awful it would be to be… trapped in a place like that.”

“Okay.” Sebastian nods, and he reaches for one of Arcade’s hands. He opens his mouth to speak, shuts it. He doubts he’ll be able to go back to sleep for now, anyways, and it’s still too early to travel.

Instead, it’s Arcade who breaks the silence. His eyebrows are furrowed, and the worry is evident in his voice. “Sebastian… this isn’t what was bothering you was it? Because you know you can always tell me.”

Sebastian shakes his head, a small smile gracing his features. He sits up, pressing a chaste kiss to Arcade’s lips. “No, it’s not. I promise.”

“You still don’t want to talk about it?”

“...Task at hand first, then I’ll tell you.”

“The obvious hesitation in your voice makes me doubt that, but I trust your judgement, naturally. You know you’re the talker between us, Sebastian. It’s… _strange_ —for lack of a better term—when you’re quiet.”

Sebastian hums, settling down in the spot next to Arcade. “I’m sorry. There’s… a lot on my mind right now. Like, besides the usual.” His tone is light, almost jovial, despite the seriousness of it all. The Courier had a knack of doing that, he supposes it just makes things a bit better.

“Oh, that’s fine. Just… voicing my thoughts, is all. But for reference… I’m not doing anything wrong, am I? I’m not necessarily an… _expert_ when it comes to these sorts of things.” Arcade averts his gaze, but he soon sputters when Sebastian damn near tackled him into a hug.

“No, nothing like that!” Sebastian quickly shakes his head, his arms wrapped around the other’s waist. “You’re perfect, okay? I swear it’s not you.”

“Alright, alright,” Arcade starts, a small snort escaping him when the Courier starts pressing kisses against his face. “Nightmares don’t stop you from being as sappy as ever, I see.” There’s a half-smile on his face, and he leans over to press a brisk kiss to Sebastian’s temple. “Not that I particularly mind.”

“Could do without the nightmares, though,” Sebastian murmurs, taking the doctor’s hand. When Arcade gently squeezes his hand, he smiles. “I’m really glad you’re here.” He’s leaning against the taller man’s shoulder again, running his thumb across Arcade’s knuckles. The sun’s just about to rise, and he’s watching it quietly.

“Don’t worry, I’ll be here.” Arcade replies, but he frowns a bit afterwards. He’s thinking about Hoover Dam again, and the battle that’s to come. He’s been thinking about Sebastian’s thoughts on it the entirety of their travels, and he’s starting to see a point. The Remnants… that isn’t his story. And it wouldn’t be his fight. He’ll be needed at the Old Mormon Fort, despite him being more of a researcher. He’ll have to break it to Sebastian eventually, but he wasn’t sure how the other would take it. _God_ , if only he was… _good_ at words. He settles for a sigh, leaning against the Courier as well. His next words are almost a reassurance to himself.

 

“I’ll be here.”

 

* * *

 

Collecting the Remnants was the easy part, but keeping them together to go alongside the NCR was easier said than done. When Moreno had stormed out at the idea, Arcade thought they were done for. However, he finds himself standing corrected when Sebastian had talked him out of leaving. The Courier wasn’t always… _smooth_ but he picked his words well. He had always known what to say no matter the situation, and Arcade almost envied that. Once Sebastian had left the Remnants to plan, he pulls him aside. He breathes out, there wasn’t going to be a better time than now. _Here goes nothing_.

Sebastian looks confused for a moment, but he soon flashes him a grin. “Somewhere shady? This isn’t your style, Arcade. Can’t say I’m complaining, though.”

Arcade smiles, but only for the briefest of moments. “Cheeky, but no. It’s a bit more serious, I’m afraid.” When Sebastian only frowns with the cock of his head, he almost wants to back away. He doesn’t though, and he takes Sebastian’s hand. “I just wanted to thank you, for getting them back together again. I didn’t think we’d be able to do it, actually.”

“Aw, come on. Have faith in us.” Sebastian squeezes his hand, a gentle smile returning to his face. “I think we’ll actually have a shot at pushing the Legion away with them around now. All there’s left to do is the actual fighting.”

“Yeah, that’s… what I wanted to talk to you about. Looking at all them in one place, and thinking back on what you’ve told me… I don’t know what my place is in all of this. It seems presumptuous of me to join in the fight, even if it’s a cause worth fighting for.”

Just like that, Sebastian frowns again. He’s holding onto Arcade’s hand tighter, almost as if to keep him there. “What do you mean?”

Arcade swallows hard, but he only manages a shrug. “Look, when you’re up there fighting on the dam, all hell is gonna break loose in Freeside. They’ll need me—and every doctor they can get—at the Old Mormon Fort.”

“You’re not… coming with me?”

Arcade gives him a solemn smile. “It’ll be a bloodbath, I’ll have to stay behind. Besides, you have a point. Sometimes staying put is for the best. I wasn’t really made for fighting anyways.” There’s an uncomfortable silence between them, but Arcade soon breaks it, leaning down to press a small kiss to the Courier’s forehead. “...I have to go take care of something before I set up in Freeside. I’ll see you again soon, don’t worry.” He makes his move to leave, but Sebastian calls him back.

“Wait— the, ah, thing I haven’t told you yet,” Sebastian starts, but Arcade waves him off.

“Tell me when I get back. It’ll be better that way, I think.”

“...If you insist.” Sebastian nods and watches him walk off, trying to mask his disappointment. Once Arcade was out of sight, he makes his way back to have one last word with the Remnants.

 

* * *

 

Sebastian was practically pacing around outside the bunker when Arcade returns. He all but pulled him into an embrace when he had seen the doctor walking back. He gives Arcade a smile, but it soon disappears when he sees the solemn expression on his face. “...You’re back.”

“Told you I had to do something,” Arcade starts, showing off his father’s power armor. “It belonged to my father. I was planning on using it at Hoover Dam but seeing as I won’t be there, I figure you could have it. I see no reason in holding onto it, and I can’t think of anyone else more deserving of it. I… I won’t be there to patch you up, so this should do the trick. Unless the Legion suddenly decides to use energy weapons, but that’s something I highly doubt. But if you ever need anything—anything at all—you know where to find me.”

“I—” Sebastian swallows hard, but he gives Arcade a smile. “I’m honored. I’ll put it to good use, I promise.” He opens his mouth to speak, but shuts it again, letting the other speak.

“...That’s all I’m asking for. We’ve been living in Caesar’s shadow long enough, I’m glad you’re changing that. I won’t be there to stop him, but you are. _Fortis fortuna_ _adiu—_  Sebastian?” Arcade gets cut off when he hears a quiet sob escape the other. Looking back at him, he immediately frowns. The other had his gaze averted and the tears were flowing freely down his cheeks again.

“I— I’m sorry for cutting you off,” Sebastian starts, his cheeks flushed. “I just— I don’t want you to go, Arcade.” He’s holding onto Arcade’s hand again, gripping it tightly as though it were a lifeline. “I’ve gone… _weeks_ without seeing your face. While I was out of the Mojave, all I could think about was you and what you could’ve said about it all. I… I missed you.”

And just like that, everything was hitting Arcade at full force. _Christ_ , he was a massive idiot for not realizing it sooner. Of course that’s what had been bothering Sebastian from the very start. He quickly wraps his arms around the Courier, who immediately buries his head in Arcade’s shoulder. “Again, stop apologizing. So this... this was what you wanted to tell me,” Arcade murmurs, and when he feels the other nod against him, his frown grows. “God, I— I’m sorry, I should’ve known.” He pulls away to look Sebastian in the eyes, wiping away his tears for the second time that day. “I can’t be with you at Hoover Dam, but you know where to find me. Granted, I’ll probably be very busy helping keep Freeside from tearing itself apart, but… come find me when you’re done fighting. I’ll be waiting for you.”

Sebastian nods, leaning into Arcade’s hand. “I— I will.” He takes a deep breath before pulling the other down to kiss him. Despite his tears, he can’t help but smile when he sees the red on the doctor’s cheeks. “Arcade… you’ll be okay, right?”

“Hey, have a little faith in me. I won’t die, if that’s what you’re thinking.” Arcade jokes, reaching up to push a few stray strands away from the Courier’s face. “...I know you’ll do great out there. _Fortis fortuna_ _adiuvat_. Fortune favors the bold.” When the other gives him a small nod, he leans back in for one last, chaste kiss. “Be careful, still. I love you, Sebastian.”

“I love you too, Arcade. I’ll see you when it’s all over.”


End file.
